A Stripper: A noun. A person who strips or performs a striptease.
A Hooker: A noun. A prostitute.
I think the time has come to point out to people that there is a difference, a very large difference between A Bartender, A Stripper, And a Hooker. Now I know that most people would be able to see a difference right away. One being that I neither show my breasts nor have sex with my customers but somehow people have gotten confused. That being said here is my list Bar Etiquette… somehow people seem to have forgotten the basics.
-Your bartender/server/host/busboy is probably making minimum wage and relies heavily on your tips. Now I know that you say you do not get tips at your job. And that’s fine, but I’m also pretty sure you get paid more than 8-10 dollars an hour, have health insurance, paid sick days, 2 weeks vacation and don’t get harassed on an hourly basis. So here’s the thing, if you do not believe in tipping- then you shouldn’t be drinking at a bar! Generally it should be a dollar a drink. Now when you buy a beer for 3.50, it is nice if you just give the 1.50 as a tip but 1 dollar would be fine, 50 cents IS NOT acceptable. Now if you are drinking multiple rounds, keep tipping! Unless you want to give 20 dollars as your first tip it is not acceptable to think after giving your measly dollar you don’t have to tip for the rest of the evening.
-Even if your drink is free- you still have to tip. Even if think the bartender is your best friend- you still have to tip. A class act is the owners of the bar I work at- when they come in and order they still tip me every time! The thing to remember is you still have to tip. So if I hand you your change and you walk away you better bet I’m putting a voodoo curse on your cheap ass.
-If you want an evening at a strip club that’s your choice. Yet when you walk into a sports bar DO NOT EVER ask the bartender or waitress to show you their breasts. That is not acceptable EVER.
-I have a name, though I understand you not knowing it. And that’s fine. If you want my attention and feel the need to scream across the bar a simple Miss will work. Bartender, Hey You, Wench (I kid you not I got that one last night), Honey, Sexy, Sugar- none of those are proper names to call someone. It is also not acceptable to whistle or snap.
-I basically get paid to be nice to you. Sure I smile and maybe even flirt a bit-though mostly I’m thinking please remember to tip me. Don’t confuse me being nice to meaning I want to take you home with me. Remember first and foremost you might be in a bar but I am at work. Now I know some bartender have no problem using the job to pick up people, but the majority of us DO NOT USE WORK AS A DATING SERVICE. So please do not ask me if you can cook me dinner, take me out, cheer me up, take me home…
-We all have our bad days too. Some days our minds are on other things. So if we ask your order for the second time or give you the wrong drink. Just let us know politely… because yelling that this is wrong isn’t the way to go. It’s the way to get someone to spit in your drink. Now I actually would never do that (I’m a big believer in Karma) but I know many of your bartenders/waiters/servers that do!
-Almost no one that is serving you a bar or restaurant wants to be doing that for the rest of their lives. Please don’t ask oh did you go to school? Oh why aren’t you working in Film anymore? Have you though about doing (fill in the blank)? Because trust me we have. And are trying to do (fill in the blank). So please don’t make us feel any worse about it than we already do. And don’t be surprised to hear that many of us have gone to the top Universities. Yes I work in a bar. Yes I have blonde hair. No I am not stupid or dumb. So don’t treat me that way. And talking down to me will only ensure that the guy next to you will get his drink first next time.
-Don’t expect free drinks or tell me about how you use to get a free drink after you ordered free ones. Sure I know it’s nice to get a free drink but some of us are accountable for our liquor. At my bar they even count the empty bottles so at the end of the evening when I end up with more beer bottles than are paid for I have to account for that. Trust me bar managers know how much liquor is being paid for and how much is given away free. And you might be grumbling that you had to pay for all your alcohol, but hey bartenders have to worry about paying for their bills and without a job that’s next to impossible.
That being said for as many horrible customers that we have, there are three times as many really nice customers out there that make us smile and make the day seem not so bad. And despite the many complaints I have to do like bartending. It’s fun to meet all kinds of different people and hear their crazy stories. And trust me there are some CRAZY ones. And it sure as hell beats having to work in retail or sit in front of a desk all do just hating life. So just remember, while you are out there having fun there is someone working pretty damn hard to make that happen. So smile at us, be patient, and tip large!
-Your bartender/server/host/busboy is probably making minimum wage and relies heavily on your tips. Now I know that you say you do not get tips at your job. And that’s fine, but I’m also pretty sure you get paid more than 8-10 dollars an hour, have health insurance, paid sick days, 2 weeks vacation and don’t get harassed on an hourly basis. So here’s the thing, if you do not believe in tipping- then you shouldn’t be drinking at a bar! Generally it should be a dollar a drink. Now when you buy a beer for 3.50, it is nice if you just give the 1.50 as a tip but 1 dollar would be fine, 50 cents IS NOT acceptable. Now if you are drinking multiple rounds, keep tipping! Unless you want to give 20 dollars as your first tip it is not acceptable to think after giving your measly dollar you don’t have to tip for the rest of the evening.
-Even if your drink is free- you still have to tip. Even if think the bartender is your best friend- you still have to tip. A class act is the owners of the bar I work at- when they come in and order they still tip me every time! The thing to remember is you still have to tip. So if I hand you your change and you walk away you better bet I’m putting a voodoo curse on your cheap ass.
-If you want an evening at a strip club that’s your choice. Yet when you walk into a sports bar DO NOT EVER ask the bartender or waitress to show you their breasts. That is not acceptable EVER.
-I have a name, though I understand you not knowing it. And that’s fine. If you want my attention and feel the need to scream across the bar a simple Miss will work. Bartender, Hey You, Wench (I kid you not I got that one last night), Honey, Sexy, Sugar- none of those are proper names to call someone. It is also not acceptable to whistle or snap.
-I basically get paid to be nice to you. Sure I smile and maybe even flirt a bit-though mostly I’m thinking please remember to tip me. Don’t confuse me being nice to meaning I want to take you home with me. Remember first and foremost you might be in a bar but I am at work. Now I know some bartender have no problem using the job to pick up people, but the majority of us DO NOT USE WORK AS A DATING SERVICE. So please do not ask me if you can cook me dinner, take me out, cheer me up, take me home…
-We all have our bad days too. Some days our minds are on other things. So if we ask your order for the second time or give you the wrong drink. Just let us know politely… because yelling that this is wrong isn’t the way to go. It’s the way to get someone to spit in your drink. Now I actually would never do that (I’m a big believer in Karma) but I know many of your bartenders/waiters/servers that do!
-Almost no one that is serving you a bar or restaurant wants to be doing that for the rest of their lives. Please don’t ask oh did you go to school? Oh why aren’t you working in Film anymore? Have you though about doing (fill in the blank)? Because trust me we have. And are trying to do (fill in the blank). So please don’t make us feel any worse about it than we already do. And don’t be surprised to hear that many of us have gone to the top Universities. Yes I work in a bar. Yes I have blonde hair. No I am not stupid or dumb. So don’t treat me that way. And talking down to me will only ensure that the guy next to you will get his drink first next time.
-Don’t expect free drinks or tell me about how you use to get a free drink after you ordered free ones. Sure I know it’s nice to get a free drink but some of us are accountable for our liquor. At my bar they even count the empty bottles so at the end of the evening when I end up with more beer bottles than are paid for I have to account for that. Trust me bar managers know how much liquor is being paid for and how much is given away free. And you might be grumbling that you had to pay for all your alcohol, but hey bartenders have to worry about paying for their bills and without a job that’s next to impossible.
That being said for as many horrible customers that we have, there are three times as many really nice customers out there that make us smile and make the day seem not so bad. And despite the many complaints I have to do like bartending. It’s fun to meet all kinds of different people and hear their crazy stories. And trust me there are some CRAZY ones. And it sure as hell beats having to work in retail or sit in front of a desk all do just hating life. So just remember, while you are out there having fun there is someone working pretty damn hard to make that happen. So smile at us, be patient, and tip large!
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