On my drive home from San Diego today I got to thinking about great sex… we’ve all had enough bad sex, and mediocre sex and just going-through-the-motions sex to really appreciate it when it gets GOOD… But it’s hard to pinpoint what it is that makes it good. I’ve had horrible sex with guys I’ve been in love with and fantastic sex with guys I haven’t. I’ve been with large, small, pierced, circumcised, uncircumcised… I’ve had the passionate sex and the crazy positions and the interesting locales… but sometimes it’s just great without a reason. Because great passion doesn’t always come from great love. Though great love does some times result in great passion… That passion though, often comes from some place else, the question is where?
It then got me to thinking about sexual ruts. Yea I know, I had way too much time on my hands during my drive home but we all get into a rut sometimes with our partners. We see them in and out most days, and sometimes the sex life becomes just as routine as the rest of our life… but if you don’t have a chance to get into a rhythm or a rut with someone, does that mean it will stay good. Or is it only good right now for me, because there isn’t a chance to get into a rut. Because I will admit it- I’ve been having some pretty fantastic sex lately. And although there is an attempt to make it a weekly “routine” so far there isn’t anything routine about it. It’s crazy, out of the box, passionate handprints on the glass door kind of sex... But as much as I love a good crazy night of sex, there also is a moment that I crave more than that, it’s the moment while I am sleeping. It’s the moment when someone reaches for me in the middle of the night, and just as they are snuggling close I can feel a kiss on the back of my shoulder. It’s the moment that I feel a tug at my heartstrings. Because it’s not done to get anything back. It’s not done to initiate sex. It’s done just because they just can’t keep their lips off of you. And it’s the moment that makes me keep coming back. Back to good sex. Back to bad sex. And back to sex that I know is bad for me. So for all the naysayer out there that this week have asked me, what the hell are you doing- it’s that moment. That is what I’m doing…
It then got me to thinking about sexual ruts. Yea I know, I had way too much time on my hands during my drive home but we all get into a rut sometimes with our partners. We see them in and out most days, and sometimes the sex life becomes just as routine as the rest of our life… but if you don’t have a chance to get into a rhythm or a rut with someone, does that mean it will stay good. Or is it only good right now for me, because there isn’t a chance to get into a rut. Because I will admit it- I’ve been having some pretty fantastic sex lately. And although there is an attempt to make it a weekly “routine” so far there isn’t anything routine about it. It’s crazy, out of the box, passionate handprints on the glass door kind of sex... But as much as I love a good crazy night of sex, there also is a moment that I crave more than that, it’s the moment while I am sleeping. It’s the moment when someone reaches for me in the middle of the night, and just as they are snuggling close I can feel a kiss on the back of my shoulder. It’s the moment that I feel a tug at my heartstrings. Because it’s not done to get anything back. It’s not done to initiate sex. It’s done just because they just can’t keep their lips off of you. And it’s the moment that makes me keep coming back. Back to good sex. Back to bad sex. And back to sex that I know is bad for me. So for all the naysayer out there that this week have asked me, what the hell are you doing- it’s that moment. That is what I’m doing…
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