Will the real Hardt please stand up?

Over the years I have gotten many criticisms on my extremely large personality. Everything from EVERYONE telling me, to talk softer to multiple friends telling me that maybe I should try and be a little more subdued around guys, to an ex who actually told me I was “cold”… I know I’m a little larger than life, a little louder than most, more sexual than is probably normal, I don’t have a filter, just say whatever comes to my mind and live my life as an open book- telling everything to all, even if more times than not they really don’t want to hear it. And sometimes that scares people off, sometimes it attracts people for the wrong reasons but sometimes it’s just right. And for the most part I’m pretty secure in who I am… though lately I have been having my doubts.After searching for a job these last couple of months I’ve started to think that maybe there is something wrong. In every interview I get out of they tell me how much they just LOVED me, so much that when they call to tell me that they won't be offering me the job they always let me know that they are passing my resume along to everyone they know because I am so great. And strangely they all have passed my resume along. Which of course only started once again the cycle of: interview, loved by all and then rejected once again… I also have found in my love life lately that maybe I do need to hold back. Hold back on what I say, hold back on my sexuality, and after scaring off Mr. Green this past weekend maybe I need to hold back hammering home what I need out of “relationship”. So it’s only normal that I went into an interview on Tuesday a little out of sorts. On the heals of many rejections (both professional and personally in the last couple of months) I thought it would be best to kind of hang up the fabulous Hardt and go with just all right Hardt. And in the end it turns out that the one interview when I could have brought out the real me, was the one that I held back… And when she called to check my references she told them that although she LOVED me that she got a feeling I was holding back on her and wasn’t being myself… and she was right! Guess I should have know that when I was interviewing with an Actress who became famous for playing one of those out there crazy, outrageously funny, sexual woman (very much like myself!) that she would have appreciated meeting the crazy, sexed out, loud and obnoxious Hardt… I just hope that I get the opportunity to show her that I really am just as insane as the potential that she saw in me…. Because trust me- I so am sponge worthy!