Big Sighs

Sadly I am spending my Saturday morning once again at work… it’s been one crazy ass week over here in my world. When I last left you I was enjoying Raccoons and nights at Mr. FB’s house, anticipating our “big date” last Friday. Well that big date became a big disaster when he found out the Mr. Uni wasn’t too excited about us hanging out. And sadly, despite what was a great connection, he decided “Bros before Hoes” and I was sent packing. Though technically he’s still pondering the idea of us, and doesn’t know what to do since he does really like me (though had to basically stalk him this week to get that info since he was more comfortable talking to one of my friends about this instead of me!). But after a week of me every day being like we need to talk what’s going on, I got the official I need space you are too much this week from him. And granted I was…. Though in my defense, after getting the full court press from him it was a drastic change this week. And we all know I don’t do well with change, and kind of went into a panic. And despite his stop, relax, you have nothing to panic about I went into my head anyways… well giving him his space. Though we shall see if that even helps, I think the damage, sadly, is already done. And of course as is par for the course in my love life, after meeting someone new this week, Mr. Grip, I was asked out… but this time I had the will power to just say NO. Sure he’s totally my type and normal I would just jump and say yes, but after jumping from one guy to the next this past year I really need a break! I am still holding out hope that maybe Mr. FB will come around, but in the meantime I’m giving myself a much needed break from men. And yes it was hard when Mr. Ex called last night to come over for dinner and a little cuddle. But I told him no. I need to just clear my head for a bit…In the meantime I have been working like a dog over here. Putting in 14 hour days, stressed to the max, working 6 days a week the last two weeks and basically just exhausted beyond belief. Everything and anything has gone wrong on this shoot and it’s my first official time as a coordinator so I’m kind of just flying by the seat of my pants on this one. There are a lot of hot tempers (already had a first fight, a verbal fight, a quitting, and a firing on set!), a lot of work that needs to be done for little money and not enough time… but it’s been a great learning experience. And I leave most days just exhilarated, even those days when I’m leaving the set at 2am!I had one day off this week, spent it surfing and relaxing with friends on the beach… It was great. Just what I need to reboot and start my week (and life) over. I kind of threw out the window a bunch of changes that I hoped to make in the New Year… so I’m thinking February 1st is the ideal time to just start over…. AGAIN.